A Fathers Love

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Paladin06, Mar 24, 2015.

  1. Paladin06

    Paladin06 Have Guns Will Travel Staff Member Hellcat Car Club Gold Supporting Member

    Sep 3, 2014
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    San Tan Valley, AZ
    Challenger SRT Hellcat
    An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return, her Father cursed her heavily. 'Where have ye been all this time, child? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother thru?' The girl, crying, replied, Sniff, sniff... Dad... I became a prostitute.' Ye what!? Get out a here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this Catholic family.' 'OK, Dad.. As ye wish. I only came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion, plus a £5 million savings certificate. For me little brother, this gold Rolex. And for ye Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the country club ... (takes a breath) ... And an invitation for ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera ..' 'What was it ye said ye had become?' says Dad. Girl, crying again, 'A prostitute, Daddy! Sniff, sniff.' 'Oh! My Goodness! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant! Come here and give yer old Dad a hug!
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  2. Dances With Empties

    Dances With Empties Gold Member

    Nov 10, 2014
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    Where rednecks are nervous of hillbillies
    Challenger SRT Hellcat
    Reminds of the one about the Irish funeral:

    A man leaving a convenience store with his morning coffee noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery.

    A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 20 Feet behind the first one.

    Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a dog on a leash.

    Behind him a short distance, were about 200 men walking in single file.

    The man couldn’t stand the curiosity. He respectfully approached the man walking the dog and said:

    “I am so sorry for your loss, and this may be a bad time to disturb you, but I’ve never seen a funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?”

    “My wife’s.”

    ”What happened to her?”

    “She yelled at me and my dog attacked and killed her.”He inquired further, “But who is in the second hearse?”

    The man answered, “My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog turned on her as well.”

    A very poignant and touching moment of brotherhood and silence passed between the two men.

    “Can I borrow the dog?”

    The man replied, “You will have to get in line.”
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